This weekend has been really tough... finding out about someone you care for doesn't want to be that way with you is heartbreaking. The things we have been thru and experienced have been amazing, and have strengthen our friends 10 times than what it was... I fell in love with her but alas she fell in love with someone else. The ever so deep dagger plunging into my heart. I will always remain that best friend to her, we laugh and have fun but deep inside i hurt cuz i know that this quest i put upon myself will be tougher and may end. I will not give up like i have been told in the past. I cant and wont. i have to be persistent if i am to woo her over again. She has gone thru so much these past months and its not fair to bother her. but with my lack of persistent attention she fell for someone else. Normal i guess, or lost interest in me for something she truly wants and i cannot provide yet... I have never felt so strongly for some one. and maybe i am blinded by this love or lust. I am grateful for the friendship we have...
this past week my best friend for the last 6 years has passed away in a car accident.... why must my loved ones be taken away from me... its been awhile but i actually sat in a corner and teared up... I cannot think straight and my chest hurts.... I miss you anne and need you now more than ever... I have a person that hates me because he thinks i caused his divorce... so then he wished me harm cuz of it... after that threat my bff passes away... All i can think is that his negative energy somehow took Anne away from me.... I don't like him now cuz of this. She was my inspiration to pursue my crush/bff now no one is here, and things are falling apart. yet i still have a urge of optimism... with Valkyrie and others... ya...
